by Ross Bishop
We come to Earth, and no one tells us why. This is intentional. If you knew, it would interfere with the process. The simple truth is that when it comes to certain issues, such as loving yourself, you get stuck. You have come to Earth to change that.
Consider this: take pen and paper and list the ten or so things you love. Take a minute to do it now. (Don’t cheat—this is important!).
Were you on that list? Probably not. And that’s where the trouble begins. Until you are “healed,” you’re like a car with a flat tire. Almost all of you is fine, but you can’t go anywhere. What’s wrong? In a word, you don’t love yourself, which then leads to all sorts of complications.
Consider your life. Then look at the lives of those around you. Life is basically a pain. Why? Because we are being pushed to go one way and we resist. Why? Even though the prospect is positive, we don’t believe we deserve it. Thus we resist. Sure, you get by, but what about being truly happy? Have you set that aside and compromised because you thought it was unreachable?
If you loved yourself, you wouldn’t get pulled off center by situations or by the gyrations of those around you. And if everyone loved themselves, there wouldn’t be any gyrations in the first place!
But let’s look more closely at those “gyrations.” They aren’t just events. If one of those “gyrations” gets to you, it means there is something about loving yourself you have yet to learn. These are teachers, and each one has been created perfectly and especially for you. There are no mistakes. Whatever it is, that is why it is in your life!
Let me give you an example: let’s say someone, in some way or another, says, “I love you!” It doesn’t have to be a big thing, but it obliges you to respond. What do you do with that? If you have healed yourself, you will graciously accept that offering. If not, what will you do? This is where the “gyrations” come in. You’ll bob and weave your way through the situation to cope as best you can, preferably without hurting the other person’s feelings.
And those “gyrations” are driven by what you brought to Earth to work on. In any case, you’ll do something to deflect their love away. And you can do that in a hundred different ways. And why? Because you don’t believe you deserve what they offer! Now, if you could step back and look more objectively at the situation, you would see that the universe is giving you the perfect opportunity to work with what remains unfinished within yourself. This is the only reason you have come to Earth!
We use each other as crash dummies for our mutual learning. In my example, I said the other person conveyed love. They don’t exactly do that. Because of their own issues, they will hold back from openly expressing what they feel. We respond to their uncertainty, and because of what we believe about ourselves, we get lost in the gyrations. We spin down with them and get lost in the weeds, rarely seeing what is really going on. On the other hand, if you really loved yourself, you would have compassion for their situation. And with that, there would be no conflict!
And so the universe gives you opportunity after opportunity, knowing that someday, almost in spite of yourself, you’ll finally get it. That is the perfection of the process. It may take time, but eventually you will get it!
Although your destiny has been decided, the real challenge is how much grief you are willing to endure before you give up and accept the truth about yourself. And that grief is purposeful, too! Pile on enough stress, and the structure you are hiding behind will eventually collapse under its own weight. It may take a while, but your wall is built on a foundation of sand and simply cannot endure.
Childhood plays a vital part in our drama. We don’t realize it, but our parents have been perfectly chosen for us because of what we need to work on. They are perfectly suited to provide the blend of love and grief we need to set us on our journey. Again, it all depends on what you bring in - essentially, what remains unresolved from your previous lives. And don’t miss this - what you get has been perfectly crafted to fit what you need to work on. Like it or not - and you probably won’t.
Perhaps you are wondering whether there are ways to shortcut the process. There are two techniques I’m familiar with that can help, and I urge you to learn them both.
The first technique is to “simply” fill your heart with love as you go through your days. In other words, “act as if.” When you interact with your kids or partner, coworkers, or your dog, come from a place of love and compassion. Don’t analyze the situation; don’t feel compelled to offer advice; just love them for who they are. I know it’s playacting, but try it and see where it takes you. And when you realize you’ve lost it, just start over.
Secondly, on my website, there is an article titled “Self Development” (https://www.rossbishop.com/self-development/). In that article, there is a technique to help you validate the truth about yourself, which, in all likelihood, contradicts what you believe about yourself. When used regularly, this technique has proven to be a great help to people, but most folks avoid it because it conflicts with what they believe.
And try to remember that at the core of your being, where everything is silent, you are love. There can be nothing else.
