Two roads diverged in a wood, and I-
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
Every life situation presents a choice. You either move to a place of compassion or not, regardless of context. Always. Every situation. Love for them. . . love for yourself. . . or not.
Most of the time you do not chose compassion because being compassionate makes you feel exposed and vulnerable. After all, your history has taught you that when you open your heart to love, you get hurt! These people could hurt you and therefore there is not much incentive for you to be open to them.
It isn’t that you are wrong – people hurt each other all the time. So of course, you could be hurt. Our error, and one that most people make, is that being hurt matters. It doesn’t. Krishnamurti’s one great lesson, his great secret was, “I don’t mind what happens.”
Of course you aren’t going to like it when someone else does something unkind or gossipy or stupid. But what causes you pain is the insecure part of yourself that feels exposed. The part of you that feels inadequate and unworthy lives in terror of being found out.
As long as you believe that you deserve to be treated poorly or unloved or that what they say or do reflects the truth about you, it will be very difficult to take the risk to love freely and openly. And once you slide into that kind of thinking, you’re in quicksand.
I am going to set aside physical harm because that operates under somewhat different rules. I am talking about feeling hurt by what someone else says or does. Gossips and fools can make things difficult, and you aren’t going to like what they do, but short of physical abuse, there is nothing they do that can really harm you – unless you let it. And there’s the rub. You are a beautiful, special child of God, but until you know that, you will remain vulnerable to being hurt.
This poses a dilemma for The Universe. The reason you are here on earth is to challenge and ultimately release, the beliefs of inadequacy and unworthiness that separate you from The Creator. There is no way that your beliefs can be true, but if The Universe just sent you flowers and chocolate, nothing would change except your waistline. You’d still hold your beliefs.
Other people can make things difficult, but they cannot harm you. But as long as you believe they can, The Universe uses your fear to bring you to the truth. How? It pushes on your feelings of inadequacy until you get sick and tired of living through them and start looking for alternatives.
The one truth we know about life is that it is going to hurt! It must, because that is the mechanism that makes us change. When asked the meaning of life, Buddha’s simple reply was, “Life is pain.”
The Universe uses your relationships with other people and your inner dialogue to bring you to the truth. It will take you down this bumpy road until you can’t stand it any more. And it is amazing how much you will put yourself through to avoid confronting your beliefs and finding a different road. Eventually you will realize the truth and let your limiting self-beliefs go. You decided that before you came here.
It feels unfair to have The Universe constantly push on you, but what you probably don’t see is that your life situations have been carefully crafted for the specific purpose of helping you move beyond the boundaries of your woundedness. We get lost in situations and being hurt and rarely get to the deeper lessons presented, but The Universe is patient.
You can turn away and temporarily avoid feeling vulnerable, but that only buys you time, it doesn’t change anything. Some people spend their lives avoiding, but that is an exercise in wheel spinning, but it caries a price. There are consequences for avoidance. The ante gets raised every time you turn away.
When you refuse the truth you step off the path and stumble through a tangle of rocks, brambles and mud that consume enormous amounts of your personal energy, make you angry and keep you feeling isolated. And what’s worse, you make a mess and end up going nowhere.
Eventually you’ll get hit by the Universal Steamroller. You will experience a crisis (or perhaps a disease) – something to shake your tree so soundly that you will be forced to address the beliefs you keep hidden and think that the world cannot see.
The positive thing about tromping through the brambles and muck is that you eventually get sick and tired of doing it! And that frustration eventually motivates you to change. Ultimately you must come back to the path because, like it or not, there is nowhere else to go! That is how The Universe has been designed.
We like to believe that we are in control of our lives, and to a certain extent we are, it is just that all but one of the choices available to us leads to pain. It’s like trying to jump over your house. You can try and try and wear yourself out, but eventually gravity will win. The Universe always wins.
So if there really is only one true choice why don’t we just take it? If the true path is so much easier, why don’t we just go there? And how did you get to this place anyway? What makes you react to other people as you do?
copyright©Blue Lotus Press 2016