There are basically two kinds of power. You are familiar with the first – Power Over. Power Over is the authority to require complicity with laws, regulations and rules of behavior. In our world Power Over is enforced by parents, police and the military. In the short term, Power Over is efficient. It may not always pick the best solutions,Read more

Making The Other An “It”

Hassidic philosopher Martin Buber wrote that people have two kinds of relationships. Buber defined these as either ”I : it,” or “I : You.” The difference is that in “I : it” the other person becomes a thing, an object, whereas in “I : you,” they retain their essential humanity. Since in “I : it,” the other has lost their uniquenessRead more

Having Hurt Feelings

OK, so your partner said something hurtful and it stung! You are wounded, angry and you feel betrayed. Inside, you feel like you have leprosy. No one likes being in these situations, even though we all end up there from time to time. When something like this happens we usually get caught up in the drama and feeling hurt andRead more

A Modern Fable

In this story you are an infant. One of your parents, let’s say your mother, is holding you. (In a classic fairy tale you would be a golden haired princess and you would be being held prisoner by an evil witch, but we’re on a budget, so we’ll do the common person’s fairy tale.) Your mother is struggling with herRead more